The Church’s Teaching on Marriage
The perennial Catholic doctrine on the nature, sacramental grace, and moral requirements of Holy Matrimony.
Catechism Summary for Adults
Three Lessons on Marriage
These three catechism lessons — drawn from a traditional catechetical summary — present the Church’s teaching on marriage in a clear, direct format suitable for those preparing for or already in the married state.
Lesson 34: God Made Marriage
God established marriage before any human government existed. "Male and female he created them" (Genesis 1:27-28), establishing the foundational model for all subsequent marriages.
TWO PRIMARY PURPOSES OF MARRIAGE
1. Children — "Increase and multiply" represents the first purpose, aligned with the biological complementarity between men and women. Children are "the greatest source of happiness in marriage."
2. Mutual Love and Support — "It is not good for man to be alone" (Genesis 2:18-22) reflects the second purpose, where spouses provide emotional and practical assistance throughout life.
THE ROLE OF SEXUAL PLEASURE
Sexual pleasure serves a God-designed function: primarily to motivate the generation of new life, and secondarily to deepen spousal bonding. When couples prioritize pleasure over responsibility, they "re-arrange the plan of God."
THE PERMANENT MARRIAGE BOND
Marriage endures "until death" (1 Corinthians 7:39). God made no exceptions to this principle because couples might otherwise enter marriage conditionally, avoiding genuine problem-solving. "What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder."
HISTORICAL CONTEXT — Pre-Christian societies treated marriage as disposable and women as property. Christ elevated marriage to sacramental status, making it a vehicle of grace modeled upon His own union with the Church.
Lesson 35: The Sins Against Marriage
THE MARRIAGE DUTY
Spouses have reciprocal rights to sexual intercourse. Refusal without legitimate cause (serious illness, intoxication, danger to unborn child) may constitute serious sin. "Let the husband render to the wife what is due her, and likewise the wife to the husband." (1 Corinthians 7:3)
ADULTERY — Sexual relations outside marriage represent grave violations of both justice and chastity. "Fornicators and adulterers God will punish." (Hebrews 13:4)
UNLAWFUL SEPARATION — Only the Church can authorize separation. Separated persons remain married and cannot date or remarry while their spouse lives. "Whosoever shall put away his wife and marry another committeth adultery." (Mark 10:11)
DIVORCE AND REMARRIAGE
"What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder ... Whosoever shall put away his wife and marry another committeth adultery." (Mark 10:9-12) Civil divorce cannot dissolve a valid sacramental marriage in the eyes of God and the Church.
BIRTH CONTROL — Any method of preventing pregnancy — whether mechanical or chemical — that is used to frustrate the procreative purpose of the conjugal act constitutes a grave moral disorder. The Church's teaching on this point, stated in Casti Connubii (1930) and reaffirmed in Humanae Vitae (1968), is part of the ordinary and universal magisterium.
ABORTION — Deliberately ending the life of an unborn child is gravely sinful — never permissible regardless of circumstances. Catholics who procure or cooperate in procuring an abortion incur excommunication latae sententiae.
STERILIZATION — Surgical procedures rendering reproduction impossible, when done with the intent to prevent conception, constitute a grave moral disorder.
Lesson 36: The Christian Marriage
THE SACRAMENTAL NATURE
Jesus Christ elevated matrimony to sacramental status, conferring upon the couple at the moment of their consent the grace necessary to fulfill their marital duties, navigate difficulties, and lead each other to salvation.
"Matrimony is the Sacrament by which a baptized man and a baptized woman bind themselves for life in a lawful marriage and receive the grace to discharge their duties."
VALID CATHOLIC MARRIAGE REQUIREMENTS
Marriage must be performed by a Catholic priest with two witnesses present. Both parties must be baptized. The couple must be in a state of grace to receive the Sacrament fruitfully. Catholics who marry outside the Church without a dispensation commit serious sin; those who marry before a non-Catholic minister incur excommunication.
MIXED MARRIAGES — Marriages between Catholics and non-Catholics are "forbidden by the Church" as a general rule, creating practical difficulties regarding: different attitudes toward divorce, absence of one parent at Mass and sacramental celebrations, and disputes over the religious education of children. Where dispensation is granted, the Catholic party must promise to raise children in the faith.
PREPARATION RECOMMENDATIONS: — Avoid marriage before age twenty-one when possible — Choose a partner demonstrating serious, regular Catholic practice — Discuss explicitly the intention to have children and raise them in the faith — Undergo formal pre-marital instruction — Inform the priest at least one month before the intended wedding date — Make a thorough confession before the wedding
CHILDREN AS BLESSING
"Children are the greatest source of happiness in marriage." Statistics from court records show "fewer marriage break-ups among couples with large families."
Pastoral Conferences
Summary of All Lessons — For Priests
These pastoral conference notes — based on Canon 1033 — provide priests with a concise summary of the Church’s teaching for use in pre-marital instruction and parish mission.
Conference I: The Sacrament of Matrimony
Marriage is defined as 'the marital union of man and woman contracted between two qualified persons which obliges them to live together throughout life.' The contract concerns 'the exclusive and perpetual right over the body of the other for actions ordered to generation.'
The two ends of marriage: (1) the education of children, (2) mutual help of spouses. The primary end is the procreation and education of children.
Essential properties: Unity (marriage is exclusive, opposing polyandry and polygamy) and Indissolubility (perfect divorce — remarriage — is forbidden; imperfect divorce — separation — is allowed for grave reasons including adultery, criminal conduct, or danger to body or soul).
The three goods of matrimony: Bonum Prolis (offspring), Bonum Fidei (fidelity), Bonum Sacramenti (the sacrament — symbolizing Christ's unity with the Church).
Conference II: The Use of Marriage
Lawful marital relations: permitted for procreation or other honorable reasons — including mutual love, avoiding incontinence, and restoring peace. Relations remain lawful even when offspring is impossible (elderly or sterile couples).
The marriage debt: spouses must render marital relations upon the request of the other, especially when the petitioner faces the danger of incontinence. Refusal without cause may be sinful.
Sins against the marriage: purposely wasting seminal fluid is gravely sinful; contraception through withdrawal (onanism) is mortal sin; artificial contraception constitutes mortal sin.
The Rhythm Method (Periodic Continence): permitted under three conditions given by Pope Pius XII — both parties are willing and able to practice temporary abstinence, and a sufficient reason exists (social, health, economic, or eugenic).
Conference III: Moral Duties of Spouses
Mutual duties: maintain ardent, sincere love modeled on Christ's love for the Church. Each spouse must give one hundred percent — 'fifty percent from one spouse and fifty percent from the other does not equal one hundred percent; it equals divorce.'
Continue shared activities from courtship; preserve honesty while avoiding unnecessary details of past relationships; help each other maintain chastity; assist in mutual sanctification.
Children's education: parents are the primary educators and cannot rely solely on schools. Education begins in infancy. Discipline is necessary and beneficial. Catholic schooling is strongly commended; age-appropriate sex instruction must be given by parents.
Husband's duties: treat wife with respect, show love, never physically strike her, direct the family with love as Christ heads the Church, work to provide for the family's needs.
Wife's duties: obey her husband 'not as a slave, but as a queen following the continuity of the king'; remain in the home to care for it and the children; avoid criticizing the husband before the children.
The Nuptial Blessing
The traditional Nuptial Blessing from the Traditional Roman Liturgy is one of the most ancient and beautiful prayers of the Church, invoking God’s blessing on the couple with children across generations, the grace to live faithfully together, and eternal life.
The blessing is given by the priest at the Nuptial Mass, after the Pater Noster. It is addressed primarily to the wife as she enters into her new vocation, and prays that she may be worthy of her husband, faithful and loving, fruitful in children, and holy in life.
The Marriage Prayer
“O Mary, Immaculate Heart, we place our marriage under your special protection. Purify our love, help us to be selfless, patient and kind to each other in all the joys and sorrows of life, so that together we may one day reach our eternal home.”
This Marian prayer entrusts the marriage to the Immaculate Heart, requesting protection, purification of love, selflessness, patience, and spiritual growth toward heaven.
Historical Documents
Pre-Vatican II Preparatory Schemas
Five documents prepared by Cardinal Ottaviani’s Preparatory Commission for the Second Vatican Council — translated into English by Fr. Joseph A. Komonchak. These original schemas show the Church’s proposed teaching before conciliar revision, and are notable for their direct, authoritative tone.
Five Schemas
On the Sources of Revelation
The doctrinal basis for Scripture and Tradition
Defending Intact the Deposit of Faith
Against errors threatening doctrinal integrity
On the Christian Moral Order
Condemnation of modern moral errors; explicit in tone
On Chastity, Marriage, the Family and Virginity
The original proposed teaching on matrimony and family
Dogmatic Constitution on the Church
The original draft of what became Lumen Gentium
Recommended Reading
Husband and Wife
Husband and Wife: The Joys, Sorrows and Glories of Married Life by Father Paul A. Wickens presents the Catholic view of marriage — its nature and purpose, the roles of husband and wife, children, marital morality, and indissolubility. The book teaches that Catholic marriage "differs substantially from non-sacramental unions because it is illuminated by the Divine Revelation of Jesus Christ."
The book opens with epigraphs from Ecclesiasticus, Genesis, and Matthew on marriage and procreation. It emphasizes that married couples are often "strangers in many ways" at their wedding but can grow together in love and holiness through God’s grace — and that this growth is the central vocation of the married state.
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ also loved the Church and delivered himself up for it, that he might sanctify it.”